Questions? We’re Here to Help
Real answers to the questions survivors, families, and supporters ask us most. If you don’t see yours, call or text us any time at 908.233.7273. It’s free and confidential.
Getting help
How do I get help right now?
Call or text our free, confidential 24/7 line at 908.233.7273. A trained advocate picks up, day or night. If you’re in immediate danger, call 911. If you’d rather not talk out loud, you can chat online with the National Sexual Assault Hotline.
Who can get support from Karolina’s Place?
Adults, teens, and families affected by sexual violence in Union County and nearby communities, including partners, family members, and friends of survivors. If you live somewhere else in New Jersey, Find Help by County shows the free program closest to you.
Does it cost anything?
No. Our sexual violence services are free and confidential.
Do you offer support in Spanish?
Yes. Support is available in English and Spanish. You can also visit Buscar Ayuda for information in Spanish.
How long after an assault can I get help?
There’s no time limit. Survivors reach out days, months, or even years later. Trauma doesn’t expire, and it’s never too late to get support.
What actually happens when I call?
A trained advocate answers, not a machine or a script. You can stay anonymous and share only what you want. We listen, explain your options gently, and you decide what happens next. Here’s more on what to expect.
What if I just want to talk?
That’s completely okay. You don’t need to have anything figured out or decided to call. Talking it through with an advocate is a good place to start.
About sexual violence and consent
What is sexual violence?
Sexual violence is any sexual act or behavior that happens without clear, freely given consent. It includes far more than rape: unwanted touching, being pressured or coerced, sexual acts while asleep or intoxicated, image-based abuse, and harassment all fall under sexual violence. Understanding Sexual Violence goes deeper.
What is consent?
Consent is a freely given, informed, and reversible yes. It isn’t silence, freezing, giving in out of fear, or someone who is asleep, unconscious, or incapacitated by alcohol or drugs. A past yes, a relationship, or marriage doesn’t count as consent.
Was it rape if I didn’t say no?
Yes. Consent is a clear, freely given yes, not the absence of a no. Many people can’t say no because their body goes into survival mode. Freezing, going quiet, or going along to get through it are common trauma responses, not agreement.
Was it sexual assault if we were dating or married?
Yes. Being in a relationship, being married, or having said yes before doesn’t mean consent is automatic. Every sexual interaction needs consent in that moment.
What if I froze or didn’t fight back?
Freezing is one of the body’s most common survival responses. When escape doesn’t feel possible, the body may shut down, go still, or comply. That isn’t a choice or a failure, and it doesn’t mean you consented.
Is it sexual violence if I agreed at first but then wanted it to stop?
Yes. Consent can be taken back at any time. If you wanted it to stop and it didn’t, consent was no longer there.
What if I don’t want to label what happened?
That’s okay. You don’t need to use any word for your experience. You don’t need to be certain or name it to reach out. What matters is how it affected you and what you need now.
Trauma responses
Why do I feel numb?
Numbness is a protective response. When something is overwhelming, the nervous system can dull feelings to help you get through it. Feeling numb doesn’t mean it didn’t affect you.
Why can’t I remember everything that happened?
Memory gaps are common after trauma. During a traumatic event, the brain focuses on survival, not on storing memories. Missing or fuzzy details don’t mean it didn’t happen, and healing doesn’t require remembering everything.
Is it normal to feel ashamed or guilty?
Yes, and those feelings belong to the trauma, not to you. Shame and guilt are very common after sexual violence, especially in a culture that questions survivors. They aren’t evidence that you did anything wrong.
Why does my body react even when I don’t want it to?
Trauma is stored in the nervous system. Panic, shutdown, or other physical reactions can happen automatically. These reactions are reflexes, not consent or agreement. Trauma-informed care focuses on helping your body feel safe again.
Reporting and your legal rights
Do I have to report to police to get support?
No. You can get medical care, a forensic exam, counseling, and advocacy without making a police report. Reporting is always your choice.
Is there a time limit to report sexual assault in New Jersey?
It depends on the charge. In New Jersey, sexual assault and aggravated sexual assault can be charged at any time, with no deadline. Some other offenses have time limits. Civil lawsuits have their own deadlines, and many were extended in recent years. An advocate can walk you through your options, and there’s more detail on Legal Rights and Options.
What happens if I report?
Reporting can involve giving a statement, talking with law enforcement, and possibly an investigation. Many people talk with an advocate first to understand the process and their rights before deciding. An advocate can also go with you to the police or to court.
Can I get a protective order without going to the police?
Yes, for eligible survivors. New Jersey’s Victim’s Assistance and Survivor Protection Act (VASPA) lets survivors seek a civil protective order without reporting to law enforcement or filing a criminal complaint. An advocate can help you understand whether it fits your situation.
Is there financial help for survivors?
Possibly. New Jersey’s Victims of Crime Compensation Office may help eligible survivors with costs like medical care, counseling, relocation, and lost income. Eligibility rules apply, and an advocate can help you apply.
Can I track my forensic exam kit?
Yes. New Jersey’s statewide Track-Kit system lets you follow your SAFE kit’s location and status privately, without contacting the police. You get your tracking information at the exam.
Will my therapist or advocate report what I tell them?
In most cases, no. What you share is confidential. There are a few legal exceptions, usually involving abuse of a child or a vulnerable adult, or a clear threat of harm to yourself or someone else. These limits will be explained to you at the start so there are no surprises.
Counseling and healing
Will I have to talk about the details?
No. You choose what you share and when. Therapy can help without going into graphic details at all.
What kind of therapy helps after sexual assault?
There’s no one right approach. Many survivors benefit from trauma-informed therapies that work gently with the nervous system, like trauma-focused talk therapy, somatic approaches, EMDR, or IFS. What matters most is that the therapy respects your body, your boundaries, and your timing.
What if talking about it makes things worse?
That concern makes sense. Trauma-informed therapy doesn’t require retelling what happened before you’re ready, or at all. Healing can focus on safety, calming your body, and present-day support.
Can counseling help if it happened a long time ago?
Yes. Many people start healing years or decades later and still find real relief. It’s never too late to care for yourself.
Do I have to confront the person who hurt me?
No. Healing is about you, not the person who harmed you. Confrontation isn’t required, and it isn’t safe or helpful for everyone. You decide what healing looks like.
Is there anything I can use right now, on my own?
Yes. Our free calming tools include guided breathing, grounding exercises, and calming sound. There’s nothing to sign up for, and no one will know you used them.
Online abuse and trafficking
What is technology facilitated sexual violence?
It’s any sexual harm carried out using technology, like sharing intimate images without consent, sextortion, AI-generated sexual deepfakes, unwanted explicit messages, online grooming, and tracking or cyberstalking. Learn more here.
What should I do if someone is threatening to share my intimate images?
Don’t pay or send more. Save screenshots of messages, usernames, and dates, then report and block the account. Use StopNCII.org if you’re 18 or older, or Take It Down if the images were taken before you turned 18. You can call us 24/7 at 908.233.7273 for free, confidential support.
Is sharing intimate images without consent illegal in New Jersey?
Yes. Under N.J.S.A. 2C:14-9, recording or sharing someone’s intimate images without consent is a crime, and survivors can seek civil damages under N.J.S.A. 2A:58D-1. Since April 2, 2025, creating or sharing deceptive AI deepfakes for unlawful purposes is also a crime in New Jersey.
How do I report human trafficking in New Jersey?
If someone is in immediate danger, call 911. To report a tip or get help, contact the National Human Trafficking Hotline at 1-888-373-7888 (or text HELP to 233733) or the New Jersey Human Trafficking Hotline at 1-855-END-NJ-HT (1-855-363-6548). Both are confidential and open 24/7.
For friends and family
Someone told me they were assaulted. What do I say?
Believe them, thank them for trusting you, and remind them it wasn’t their fault. Let them make their own choices about next steps. Here’s more on what to say.
Can I call even if it didn’t happen to me?
Yes. Partners, family members, and friends can call us for support and guidance. You don’t need to share the survivor’s name to ask questions.
How do I refer someone to Karolina’s Place?
Share our number, 908.233.7273, and our brochure. Encourage them to reach out when they’re ready, and respect their choice about if and when to do that.
About the Foundation and getting involved
What is Karolina’s Place?
Karolina’s Place is Union County’s confidential sexual violence resource and advocacy center, run by The Peace of Mind Foundation, a New Jersey nonprofit based in Berkeley Heights.
How can I support your work?
You can donate, volunteer, or partner with us. Every gift helps bring trauma-informed care to people who need it most.
Can I volunteer as an advocate?
Yes. We train volunteer advocates for our Sexual Violence Support Program. No prior experience is needed. See volunteer opportunities.
Do you offer internships?
Yes. Learn about internships with The Peace of Mind Foundation.
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Still have a question?
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